Secrets
SECRETS
Warning: This content contains material that may be offensive to some readers, including graphic language, dangerous and adult situations. Some situations may be hotspots for some readers.
Dedicated to my son’s
Jr- For thinking I’m some famous Author. When in reality I’m just another little fish, swimming in a great big ocean.
Jay- For always getting Momma her laptop and another soda. You have no idea just how important your job really is.
Acknowledgements-
My husband- Thanks for putting up with my laptop being glued to my hip. I love you.
My gorgeous boys- Thank you for eating cereal for dinner when I was writing like a maniac. I love you both.
My good friends Tina and Karen- Thank you for pushing me to just do it and write. Without you two, I probably would not be typing this right now. I’m so happy you Beta read for me! Thank you for all the awesome lunches we’ve had over the years. I love you two!
My newly added Beta readers -Who read this book as quick as possible to start Beta reading book two- Thank you Kath, Morello, and Lillian! It was the biggest compliment when you fell in love with my characters and then asked me to please write more! XOXO
Susan- Thank you for volunteering to read Secrets, when it was still in the process of being written. You inspired me to keep going when I was wondering if anyone would want to read it!
My Cover Designer and Photographer Sara Eirew- Thank you for such a beautiful cover. It adorns every screen on every device I own! I absolutely love it. Thank you for taking a chance on a newbie and guiding me in what needed to be done for my cover.
My Editor Mandy Pederick- Thank you so much for tearing Secrets apart and making it look beautiful! You are fantastic and have a great sense of humor! Xxx
Deb Lynn- Thank you for your support! You are the first one who liked and commented on my book posts. You continue to do so, with each new book I talk about and it keeps pushing me to write!
Lezleigh Bradley from Belles Bookin’ It- Thank you for all your help on the cover reveal!
Russian words used in Secrets- What they look like in italics and their meanings.
Красивая (Корзина)- Beautiful
Красота (Красота) - Beauty
Большой босс (Большой босс) - Big Boss
Босс (Босс) - Boss
Брат (Брат) - Brother
Пончик (Пончик) - Donut
Отец (Отец) - Father
Ебать (Ебать) - Fuck
Бог, я хотел ебать Вы так плохо красоты (Бог, я хотел ебать Вы так плохо красоты)- God, I want to fuck you so bad beauty
Я утверждаю, вы как шахта красоты навсегда (Я утверждаю, вы как шахта красоты навсегда)- I claim you as mine beauty forever
Шахта (Шахта) - Mine
Мой брат (Мой брат) - My Brother
Жаркое (Жаркое) - Roast
Russkaya Mafiya- Russian Mafia
Торт - Type of Russian dessert
Сестра (Сестра) - Sister
Она является шахта (Она является шахта) - She is mine
Сын (Сын) - Son
Корзина (Корзина) - Trash
Да (Да) – Yes
EMILY
CHAPTER 1
Deep breaths, Deep breaths, mmmm ahhhhhh, mmm ahhhh. Geez, I gotta relax before I give myself a panic attack. I can’t believe I’m stuck starting at a new school and had to skip a semester of my sophomore year. University of Tennessee; I look around and can’t help but feel some excitement. All this orange reminds me of home. No one knows who I am or anything about me and that gives me a sense of safety. Not that I’ll be out when it’s dark, walk by any shadows or leave my windows open though. I’m not completely stupid or oblivious to my own safety, even if I am far away.
I look at my schedule again. Ugh. I’m taking all my classes early morning so I don’t have to be out in the evenings and it sucks, royally. To say I’m not a morning person is an understatement. To say I’m a little paranoid is extremely accurate. First on the agenda is Government II. This should be interesting; I’m definitely going to have to take major notes. I can see this lecture going in one ear and out the other. Thank god for my Route 44 soda. One thing I love about the south is our many options for huge beverages.
Naturally, I make my way to sit in the back of the lecture hall, hoping I will blend in, unnoticed. The room is huge with rows of tables and chairs. There’s a podium at the front of the room for the professor and a oversized whiteboard. I’m sure my giant cup is like a white beacon in front of me, amongst these Starbucks drinkers. All this coffee-smelling air is making me miss my best friend, London, and missing London makes me miss home. God, I miss Texas. Hopefully one day I can go back to my granddaddy’s land. I better call London’s brother, Elliot, to make sure everything’s going okay with him taking care of the house and land.
“Hi! Man, I hope this class doesn’t suck, you know? It’s so hard having a class this early that requires me to think. I’m Avery, nice to meet you,” she says as she slides into the chair next to me.
I guess I’m no longer alone back here in my hermit-like world. I better respond because this pretty girl looks like she could talk my ear off, and it’s way too early for that ruckus!
“Hi, I’m Emily. Nice to meet you too, Avery.” I look into her eyes when I speak so she knows I’m being sincere and that I’m just sleepy.
“Have you had Mr. Pottsmooth before? I haven’t but heard he can be tough if you don’t study hard. But I sooo need this class, so what can you do, right? Oooh! I know—we can be study partners, maybe it’ll make this class a little fun?” She looks at me with a hopeful expression and I give her a small smile in return.
I really don’t know what to respond to, she just asked me like 10 questions and I’m not even half way through my soda yet. She seems really sweet though, maybe just nervous. Unless, perhaps she talks this much all of the time?
“No, I haven’t had him before.” Saved! In walks Professor Humpty Dumpty by the looks of it. I can’t help but giggle a little to myself. He’s in a terry cloth track suit, with a big belly. O.M.G.! I didn’t even know they made those for men; are they even allowed to wear that to work?
Once that disaster is over with I’m cornered again by Avery, a cheery smile on her face. “Wow, definitely didn’t see that one coming! I mean, did you see what that man was wearing? And he totally talked monotone the whole class. I mean, who does that? Not raise your voice a decimal and talk through your nose the whole time.” She’s giggling uncontrollably now, and is on the way to having hiccups. I have to laugh at her though. She just has such a cheery bubble around her and she’s kind of a silly mess.
“So, Emily, I work at this great little coffee shop a few blocks away called A Sip of Heaven, wanna go have a cup and talk about all these stupid requirements for this class?”
“Sorry, Avery, but I have to get to my other class. Maybe some other time we can meet for some ice cream or something?” That’s if she’s even really serious about us being friends. A few friends here might make it more bearable with the amount of homework it seems I’m going to have.
“OMG! I love ice cream! Okay, that sounds great!” She grabs my phone and calls her phone before I even realize it. “Okay, friend, program my number since you have it now and I’ll text you later so we can meet up.” And just like she swooped in, she’s off, bouncing down the hallway. I think I might really end up liking that girl a lot, if only we met after 10 am in the morning, I would have had mu
ch better conversation skills. She smiles and waves and I wave back.
Thankfully, the rest of my day breezes through with no drama. So far, Avery’s the only person I’ve said more than a few words to. I didn’t realize how lonely this would be, moving out here all by myself, with no one knowing where I am. I had to do it though, so I’m going to keep on trekking through and just try to be grateful I have a chance to start fresh. I have to remind myself that I almost wasn’t this lucky; I almost wasn’t able to get out.
I wasn’t expecting Avery to text me right away, but she did and I have to say I’m pretty excited to meet her for dinner. I don’t have a lot of money to splurge through, but thanks to Granddaddy’s life insurance he set up for me before he was taken from me, I’m able to eat out and not completely penny pinch. Once I turned eighteen, I was able to access my momma’s life insurance policy that my granddaddy never spent. Thank god for that or I wouldn’t be here right now.
We are meeting at a bar and grill called ‘The Flamingo Grill’. I told Avery wherever didn’t matter as long as it was close to my apartment. My Granddaddy’s teal, 1965 Ford F100 pick-up truck he left me when he passed does not have GPS, and I’m trying to not get lost on my first social outing. This girl might be a classic, but thankfully in this heat her air conditioner works like she’s brand new. I didn’t realize Tennessee was going to be more humid than Texas when I packed up and moved out here.
I take extra care picking out which sun dress and boots I am going to wear today, usually I just throw on the first one I come across. I really want to look nice today because I have no idea what the dress code is for this place. Shoot, in Texas a sundress and boots works wherever you go, so that is pretty much what my closet is full of. Today, I pick a pale yellow sundress that comes above my knee and my brown cowboy boots that have a pretty ‘choker’ on each. Some mascara and a few curls in my long, dirty blonde hair, and I am all set.
As it turns out, The Flamingo is not hard to find with its giant fake bird on the roof. Avery’s pretty face is out front waiting for me. I park away from other vehicles. I can’t have my baby girl get scratched up from other people. Granddaddy would be turning in his grave if he saw me park too close.
“Hey, girl!” I holler and wave at Avery as soon as I open my door. I give her a big smile as I walk toward her.
“Hey, Emily! Geez, you look so cute! I love your dress!” She grabs my hand while talking super-fast all excited like. “I hope you don’t mind, but I ran into a couple of guys from one of my classes and they asked if we wanted to sit together. They are totally hot so I told them yes, I hope you don’t mind. Girl, you are gonna be happy when you see these fine men!”
“Okay, Avery, but I’m not really looking to meet any guys. I’m just here to concentrate on school.” I am so not ready for another relationship; my life is way too complicated right now as it is.
“Oh, God! Girl, you have to relax a little or you will get burned out. Okay, here we arrrrrre! Miss Emily—this is Cameron Wentworth and Luka Masterson.”
I smile a little; Cameron is cute in that rich preppy jock style, “Hi, Cameron, nice to meet you.”
“Hey, Emily, you too.” He shoots me his playboy signature smile that I’m sure gets all the girls excited. I’ve seen his kind before, hell, I’ve dated his kind before, so it does nothing for me.
I look over to Luka and it’s like a punch to the gut. He’s freaking gorgeous, like magazine gorgeous. “Umm… Hi, Luka.” Thank fuck I didn’t stutter, sweet Jesus. I hope to god my mouth is shut right now and I’m not gawking like an idiot. I’m met with the most beautiful hazel eyes when I look up, and I have to look up, this man is definitely pushing six foot-two or six foot-three.
“Hey, Emily, please call me Tate.” His voice is smooth and rich like honey, the kind of voice that vibrates through your bones and wraps you up to make you feel warm inside. He reaches for my hand and when he touches me, I feel butterflies in my belly. I suck in a breath; I hope he doesn’t notice my reaction to him. This is the type of man that could steal me, own me, and eventually break me.
We sit and I feel like a big nerd just staring. Tate is nicely built, not steroid built, but in great shape, with short, dark brown hair. Cameron is pretty cute himself, a few inches shorter than Tate; he has sandy blond hair and chocolate brown eyes. The two of them together probably have to push the girls off each other with a stick.
“Tate, it sounds like you have a little bit of an accent, what is it?”
“Ha, that’s rich coming from a sweet southern thing, you’ve got quite the twang yourself, sweetie.”
I don’t know if he is being a condescending dick to me or just taking the attention off me. Regardless, I keep quiet. I generally keep to myself until I know someone well, but I just can’t help myself from talking to him. This is good though, if I’m angry at him at least I won’t be picturing his abs every time he speaks to me.
Thankfully, the server is approaching to take our orders. Avery and Cameron dominate most of the conversation, so I can just sit back and watch Tate. I don’t want to stick my foot in my mouth and I don’t really want to reveal much about myself. I have to lay low and keep to myself. I need to be careful about too many people getting to know me.
I come back from the restroom to see Tate laughing. God, he is beautiful. His laugh is rich and his eyes shine with humor, it’s like a vacuum pulling me to him. I can’t help but wonder if I could make him smile and laugh that way.
“Hey, Emily, you ready to go? These two kind gentlemen refuse to let us pay for our meals, which is so sweet!” Avery is looking way too happy about this. Personally, I don’t want to owe anybody anything, but this time I’m just going to act like it doesn’t bother me.
“Yep, I’m ready. And thank you, this is so kind of you to treat us to dinner. We will owe you guys.”
“Well, speaking of owing, how about you give me your number. I might have trouble in a few of my classes and need your help someday.” Tate’s eyes sparkle a little mischievously. Geez, did I not just say I didn’t want to owe anybody anything? I guess this is better than a date or him wanting me to wash his car or something. Plus, I can always block his number if I need to.
“Sure, if it’s for help then no problem, but I’m definitely no booty call.” I say this in my snarkiest voice possible. Maybe he will change his mind.
“Ohhhh, boom, man, she put you in your place!” Cameron looks like he just won the lottery and I’m his new best friend. I roll my eyes and turn my head away. Why do men have to act like jackasses sometimes?
“Shut your face, Cameron, and no, Emily, I am very aware you are not the type of girl to be just a random booty call. Trust me; I have plenty of females for just that purpose. Babe, you would know if you were going to be my booty call.” He looks sincere. I don’t know if that’s a compliment or not, but at least we are on the same page. We all trade numbers and Avery and I thank the boys again for dinner. They insist on walking us to our vehicles. Avery doesn’t have one so Cameron offers to give her a ride in his Porsche. I know I am going to hear all about it later, she is practically glowing.
“Thanks for inviting me, Avery; I’ll see you in class. Bye, Cameron.” I high five Cameron and give Avery a hug.
“Anytime, sweet cheeks, text me later!” I think Avery is going to bounce out of her shoes as they walk off. Yep, definitely going to hear about that!
“Thank you for walking me to my truck, Tate.” I look around and take in my surroundings. The parking lot isn’t packed, but there are quite a few cars. I’m always scanning for a certain face. I’m glad I don’t have to walk to the truck by myself, I’d probably freak myself out and drop my keys.
“It’s no problem, wow! Nice ride, never pictured you in something like this.”
“It was my granddad’s; he built it and gave it to me.” I would trade this truck in a heartbeat, just to have him back. I miss him every single day. My chest always gets tight when I think of him, the man who took care of me
for so long.
“Lucky girl. Hey, I meant what I said back there. I know you’re not a booty call; you are way too sweet and beautiful to be mistaken as trashy. Would you mind if I text you later though?” I stare at him for a beat and I think he looks like he’s being pretty sincere, so, why not.
“Okay you can text me. Good night, Tate.” I smile and look up into his hazel eyes. I am such a wimp; I put up no fight whatsoever. At this point he could ask for a backrub and I’d probably ask if he wanted lotion, too. I’m sure this is how he starts with all females. He comes off as just wanting to be friends and then swoops in when you’re least expecting it.
“Good night, Красота. (Beauty)” He leans in to me and gives me a small hug. He smells so good, crisp, and clean. His body is warm, and even in the small amount of contact we make I can feel him. He presses his full lips softly to my forehead and I melt.
For the first time in forever I feel safe.
Chapter 2
T – Good morning, Красота
Wow, I wasn’t expecting him to text me. Okay, I have to break down and ask him what this name means. I have literally been thinking of it nonstop since I heard him say it. I wasn’t sure exactly how I heard it pronounced or how it’spelled, or else I would have Googled it already.
Me – Hi, what does that mean?
T – What does what mean?
Me – You know! Красота?
T – It means pop tart
Me – Pop tart?! Seriously?
T – Haha. Have a good day, sweet Emily...
Me – I will figure it out!!! You too
Okay, so I feel a little giddy that he did end up texting me after all. Now I need soda, clothes and then I’m off to class again. This early morning crap is for the birds. I brush my hair and put on a cute pink sun dress. Add some wedges since I’m barely pushing five foot-three inches and need all the help I can get in the height department! Grab my drink and I’m all set.